Aztec Clay

When I stopped using so much that had chemicals in it (mind you, I am not chemical free still; even after 2 years into this. But that's more because my husband is resistant and it's easier to just go with the flow on some things rather than fight. I've been picking my battles), one of the things that I first changed was deodorant.

One of the reasons for changing to products with no harsh chemicals or more safe, less harmful chemicals is because of the connection of those chemicals to cancer and disruption of the body's hormones. Deodorant and antiperspirants have aluminum (among other chemicals) that presents a concern.

When looking into options for deodorant that didn't have that, I came across the need to 'detox' from these chemicals that have clogged up your pores in your armpits. If you don't, you are likely to experience harsh, painful rashes. I didn't want that, so I followed advice in a facebook group I was involved with and looked into Aztec Clay. It's said that the clay bonds with the chemicals and pulls them out of your body and skin.

Whether it actually does this or not, I don't know. I'm not a scientist. What I do know, is that my transition to natural deodorant was NOT painful. There were a couple days that I went without deodorant and I tried to be mindful of a lot of advice to not use natural deodorant right after you shave (not an issue for me now; I barely pay attention to that).

I did also choose a deodorant that was for sensitive skin b/c it contains no arrowroot and that seems to be an irritant.

To use the Aztec Clay:

I use approx 2 teaspoons/scoops of the clay in a plastic container
I mix in Raw Apple Cider Vinegar to the consistency of my choice
Some people put in essential oils to make it smell better b/c otherwise it smells like vinegar.

Put this on your armpits and allow to set there for 10-20 minutes (I started out with 10 minutes and then increased to 20).
To start out, I did this approximately 2-3 times per week.
Now, I do it much less often. Maybe once a month for my armpits.

FYI, you can use the same mask mixture and put on your face as well or instead. It's a great pore tightener and exfoliator!

Skin Care

Another new area of Life Wellness... beauty products! And in actually, more about reducing chemicals that are used on myself and in my home. More about why that is important later. What I really want to focus on today is more of a review of a product that I just tried. The biggest thing for me when looking at my beauty products and trying to find clean and/or green and/or safer options was that all the reviews were on YouTube and I had to sit through these videos to get to the end result - which wasn't always at the end for the information I wanted! Furthermore, I'm a reader, not a viewer so I really struggle to stay focused with video reviews (no offense to anyone who prefers them or anyone who does them! Thank you to those who do them b/c it was the only information I really had to go off of).

So I just tried Beautycounter's Countermatch Skin Care Regime. Let me say that I was a huge Mary Kay proponent since somewhere around the age of 16-18 and from there until age 32 I rarely strayed away (a brief time in college when I was trying to save money but I quickly went back when I started breaking out). However, that changed when I got on a chemical free kick after giving birth to my first child.

Since that time, which has been a little over a year ago since I stopped using most skin care products, my skin care has been up and down and mostly consisted of water and also me not wearing makeup b/c I had no way to cleanse my face!

Enter a co-worker posting about Beautycounter on her facebook and I was intrigued to find out more.

I did my research and got some information on other skin care products including recommendations for Farmhouse Fresh and Elemis and even saw a post about Thayers Alcohol Free Toner as a recommendation.

I started off by looking at ingredients and pricing. I used the ThinkDirty App to look up the ratings for these products. Beautycounter products seem to average around a 4/5 and Farmhouse Fresh products were staying steady at 5. Farmhouse Fresh products are cheaper while Elemis had too many options for me to wrap my head around starting out. With Thayers, it is cheap but I didn't know where to go to pair anything with it. I could have stuck to Almond Oil for moisturizing but I guess there was a part of me that really wanted a skin care set/routine to fall back on

I ultimately decided to try Beautycounter's Countermatch Skin Care and I just got it today and used it for the first time. I really like how my face feels right now. The cleansing milk goes on a dry face and it was nice and my face felt clean afterward - not heavy and not like there was any residue left on my face. Then it was toner which was also light and refreshing for my face. Then was an antioxidant serum which felt moisturizing as I put it on. Lastly, since it's night, there is a recovery night cream which is also moisturizing. My skin currently feels soft and refreshed. There isn't a scent/fragrance added to the products but it does have a scent to it but not a chemical one.

I did also get a free eye recovery cream and my eyes look awful right now - being pregnant with a young kid leaves me little time for sleeping and the black rings under my eyes are bad.

Another thing I really liked about this is that the bottles are all pump bottles which makes it convenient for knowing the amount you need for using the product (1 or 2 pumps) which I think is nice because there is no guessing game about how much you need or if it's enough. There's a booklet that tells you how much to do of each. You could always do less if you think you don't need as much in order to make it last longer.

I'm interested to see where this goes over the next week/month.

Getting Physically Healthy

Originally, this blog was more about emotional or healthy communication. However, recently I have begun to work on my physical health and that balance is just as important to emotional balance.

I started this journey approximately 3 months ago now. I started by walking for 30 minutes 3x/week and making healthier food choices like eating fresh vegetables and more salads and looking at portion sizes. I eventually also cut out soda and upped my water intake to over 64 ounces per day. I lost the first 10 pounds very easily during this time.

Then, I started the 21 Day Fix but did not follow the eating plan and adjusted the exercising to 5 days per week for the 30 minute workout. I continued to eat as I was. I fluctuated daily in my weight for about 5 days before stopping and con't to walk 4-5 days per week for 30 minutes. My best guess is that my eating was not ideal while doing the 21 Day Fix workouts. I did lose another 10 pounds when going back to walking

I again started the 21 Day Fix but did the 7 days a week for the 30 minute workouts. Today I finished day 21. Again though, I con't to eat as I had been and I have lost only 1 pound. My biggest accomplishment though was gaining more strength and endurance and I increased my flexibility! I also lowered my resting heart rate (calculated by my Fitbit!).

Still, I'm only down about 20lbs and I have another 20lbs to go. So now what. That is the ultimate question. I've been recently (as in since last night) researching about food. I'm trying to figure out what food I should be eating and what I should be avoiding.

Last night, I watched Fed Up on Netflix. It's all about added sugar in our diets/foods. This has really gotten me thinking about how much sugar I eat throughout the day. I mean, the 21 Day Fix meal plan is about clean eating - taking out processed foods from our diet. I hear about that all the time - 'Processed foods are bad for you,' 'Eat clean,' 'stop eating from packages,' 'eat fresh.' Sure I hear it, but what does it all mean really?

Does it really mean healthier to take out this sugar. I'm going to try. There already changes I know I need to make. My goal is to get down to 9 tsp of sugar per day which is actually the American Health Association's daily recommended dosage for males, not females, but I have to start somewhere. This is equal to about 36g of sugar per day (CBS news article).

After vacation, it's time to cut out more food...

Sarcasm

Sarcasm is used a lot – at least in current society. First and foremost, sarcasm can be funny. There’s no doubt about that. However, it’s only funny at certain times and, like any joke, it’s only funny if both people are laughing. Why do I clarify this? Because sarcasm can be demeaning and hurtful when used inappropriately.

Sarcasm is often used as the excuse when someone says something that hurts someone else. They say things like, ‘Lighten up. I was just joking’ or ‘I was just picking on you’ or ‘It was meant to be funny.’ The person may really have been joking or they may just be trying to cover up for their actual emotions or for their guilt over hurting someone. If you are the one using sarcasm and you hurt someone with it, apologize and hopefully they will forgive you (as we’ve discussed before). You didn’t mean it and hopefully the other person will understand. 

However, often people say they were being sarcastic because they don’t want to have a conflict about the real issue – whatever it may be. They or you may be using sarcasm in order to gauge the other person’s reaction or using it to hurt the other person because you feel hurt about something else. 

Sarcasm is never productive when used in this way. It’s one more filter and defense mechanism that is important to look out for in others as well as yourself. Using it to hurt the other person is not going to solve the problem. Hearing it used often from someone else so doesn’t seem to be validating that you were hurt by their comment might be an indication that someone else is going on.

Humor

I love humor. Although my sense of humor is cornier than most of society prefers. However, humor can be used in a variety of situations in order to ‘lighten the mood.’ Humor can be a powerful coping skill that helps those are depressed or anxious be able to alleviate moments of their overwhelming emotions. 

While there should be times to take things seriously, there also needs to be time to use humor appropriately in order to help yourself and others. Humor can be used in conversations to help facilitate emotional connections. Laughing together creates a bond.

Think about babies. Babies react to the emotions around them. They pick up on those emotions quickly. They learn to smile because others smile at them. They smile back when they see you smile. They laugh because you are laughing. They continue to do this through their toddler years as well. However, if you are mad, their emotion is confusion and fear – not anger.

I’m not saying that we has humans never develop past our basic emotional responses that we have as infants. But what I am saying is that we bond over positive emotions and experiences. Humor can bring these positive emotions and connections as well as experiences into a relationship faster. 

That doesn’t mean that you have to be a funny person. Share funny stories or jokes. Watch comical movies or shows together. Light hearts can make communication go easier because your mood is happier and you are more connected.

Review of 5 Languages of Love

Gary Chapman wrote a book titled ‘The Five Languages of Love.’ I bring up this book because I found it to be an excellent read – easy flowing. I also find the information valuable in and about relationships. 

Chapman has worked with couples for many years and has gathered information about the way that people give and receive love. He’s found that not everyone does this the same way. This is important knowledge because when you give love, you usually give it the way that you want it shown to you. But your partner may have a different language of love or a different dialect within the same language causing disappointment and feelings of un-love. 

Chapman reviews the languages of love and even has a ‘test’ in the back of the book to help you see which one you are and which one your partner is. The concept is that you need to show love to your partner the way that they receive/give/speak love in order for the feelings of love to stay there and continue to grow. 

I suggest that both partners read the book in order to fully understand. Or even read it together. Without feelings of love and connection between the two of you, the desire to communicate effectively and positively with either crash quickly or fail to even take off the ground.

Being a Team

So often, couples are heard saying that they won this or that argument. It places each person against each other. Each fight is a battle while the relationship is a war. That doesn’t sound like a lot of fun. What do you think?

Being in a relationship is more often about being on the same team as each other instead of opposite sides. This is even truer if you are parents. 

If you think about it like a sports team, when you look down the line, your partner should be next to you, not across from you. Teams in sports have to work together in order to win the game. If they aren’t communicating or working together, they tend to be losing the game more often than winning. 

Not only do teams work and communicate in order to win the game, but they also practice. Couples can practice appropriate communication at times when they are not angry so that when they do get angry, they have the words ready and they’ve become a habit.