Coping Skills

Coping skills are kind of like relaxation skills but they have a different reason for use, a different purpose. Relaxation skills are to decrease the level of stress and hence your responses to stress (both mental and physical) over time. Coping skills are for the in-the-moment, more short-term, cues to calm down. Coping skills can provide a distraction from something so that your emotions don’t become overwhelming because when our emotions do become overwhelming, we do actions and say words that we usually regret later.

For both relaxation and coping, you need to find what works for you and what I provide is by no means all inclusive but they can be like extra tools in your toolbox - something you can try in order to see if it helps fix the problem. If it doesn't work, then you can try a different tool. Here is a list of some common ones:

• Stress ball: you can buy one or make one from a balloon filled with sand. The idea is the resistance that it provides as you squeeze it - imitating the same type of tension vs relaxed muscles as the PMR
• Gum - chewing gum can have some negative side effects done extensively, but it can also help relax. It serves two purposes. There again is the tension vs relaxing of the jaw muscles as you chew but also there's a rhythm to most people's chewing. Our bodies respond to rhythms and it helps to decrease anxiety and other overwhelming emotions.
• Coloring, scribbling, drawing, painting
• Jigsaw puzzles, Crossword puzzles, word searches, sudoku - something to keep the mind focused and away from what is creating the emotions
• Focused breathing (described in Relaxation post)
• Counting: By 1’s, 5’s, 3’s, counting things, counting sounds
• Tasks/chores: Keeps your body active in order to help keep your mind off of what is bothering you until you get to a point where you have calmed down enough to process the events appropriately.
• Funny pictures, jokes, funny memories - things that make you laugh and increase the positive emotions. The positive feelings can help you handle the negative emotions better and might even help you think about the situation more rationally instead of through your emotions.
• Reading
• Writing
• Gardening
• Exercise 
• Music - rhythm

Coping skills are not intended for you to use in order to avoid the real problem or concern (whether it's in regards to your self or another person). They are only to help gain better control over your emotions so you can approach the problem or concern with better understanding and clarity. 

What are some things you could do to cope?